Hi, I’m Jamie. I Have Weird Dreams

DreamBigLiveLargeWhen I was little, I had a recurring dream that I was driving off a bridge. And also one that I was living in a tree with tree-people and I knew the secret door that led to a tumble-tunnel that could let me out of the tree. As I got older, the dreams got weirder. I can’t change them, so I embrace them. My favorites of all-time include the dream where I was an intergalactic princess (which is also a favorite of one of our former neighbors from Georgia, who still calls me The Intergalactic Princess when we talk on Facebook), any dream where I ninja the bad guys (yes, Squeaker comes by his ninja tendencies honestly), any dream where I flap my arms and take off in flight (those are the best, and I could really go for one of those about now), and the dream where I was flying an inflatable plane and the bad guys were shooting at me, but I realized I could control the bullets with my mind and went all Matrix on them.

If you’re still with me, I had a fun one the other night.

It was like Four Weddings and a Funeral, but instead, it was Thirteen Weddings and a Graduation. Except the graduation was first, and I don’t remember who was graduating. And the weddings were back-to-back, but first the couples had to complete a challenge. The first couple had a famous groom (it wasn’t Axl Rose, but I keep thinking it was), and he and his bride donned world map body paint and had to do an interpretive dance.

After they’d gotten hitched (that part’s a little hazy), the second couple was up. The church was transformed into an obstacle course maze thingie with peanut butter sandwiches and peanut butter crackers hidden throughout, and this couple had to find the peanut butter sandwiches and crackers and smear them all over each other before they could get married. I guess the point was that if neither of them cheated, or if they made it through without one of them calling the wedding off, then they were destined to be together.

And then George Clooney showed up.

You can’t go wrong when George Clooney shows up in your dreams. You just can’t. So I woke up about then. And I have absolutely no regrets.

So tell me – do you remember your dreams? Any favorites?

This month, once again I’m giving a surprise to one blog commenter! It might be a signed copy of Southern Fried Blues or Mr. Good Enough, or it might be some extra-special book-themed swag, or it might be an early copy of The Husband Games. You just never know! Want to enter? Just comment on any blog that I post in the month of July. The more blogs you comment on, the more chances you have to win! Limit one entry per post, though feel free to comment as much as you wish! And as always, my newsletter subscribers are eligible for a separate surprise giveaway! Sign up for my newsletter here! Full contest and giveaway rules here.

7 thoughts on “Hi, I’m Jamie. I Have Weird Dreams”

  1. Last night, I dreamt I fell off the shoulders of a very large man. I have no idea what I was doing there but I woke up squeaking.

  2. Ever since seeing Gary Oldman as Dracula when I was in college, I have horrible vampire dreams. I usually wake up when they start sucking blood out of my toes. I don’t have a foot or shoe fetish, so I don’t really get it. And other vampires don’t freak me out… but that has been a continual dream all these years. Creepy!

  3. Love these sorts of dreams. : ) The recurring BAD dreams aren’t quite as fun. I’ve talked to people who don’t remember their dreams or who don’t dream nearly as vividly…I can’t imagine that.

  4. i used to have a person show up in all of my dreams, he would always be in sight but too far to recognize him (across the river, up a tree). i started noticing him in my teens, i hate bad dreams too, i have woken myself up with screaming (usually someone is trying to break into the house in my dream). I also know when my stress level gets to high..i have dragons in my dreams.

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